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"Soulless...[like it's] actually something to be proud of...exposition dump...mistake in the first line...some of the worst writing I have ever come across..."
It got worse...
I remember writing that in my journal on May 8th 2024 at 8pm after a HORRIBLE day. I'd spent most of it in tears over this truly awful review I'd received on Facebook of all places, and then even longer crying over how angry at myself I was for allowing it to happen, for not responding to it the way I truly wanted to, for removing the review, and for literally every other action I'd ever taken since becoming a writer in 2010. Reviews like this really do make creatives question themselves. Are we actually talented at all? Are we just imposters? Is every good review I've ever received just out of pity?
This went in my 'success' journal. It isn't really about success but progress, documenting everything* about the re-release of my series 'The Chronicles of Pandora' to see just how far I've come, what I have achieved, and what I've survived.
I hope it helps you (or at the very least entertains you!). Perhaps you can prepare for or completely avoid the mistakes I made.
*Yes, these entries are real, but I've edited out some of the more personal and private information for obvious reasons. I hope you understand! I will also not mention the names of people, companies or shops I've encountered in a negative way. It's only my experience, so it would be unfair of me to name them when others may have had a fantastic experience.
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08/05/2024 20:00 hours - I cried as I wrote this entry, just as I'd cried a lot throughout the day. The entry isn't long, but it may give you an insight into the kinds of things people are willing to say when hidden behind the internet and a computer screen. I've left Part 3 solely about negative reviews as I feel it's a huge part of being a self-published author, and is probably something we have all suffered through or will do at some point in our career.
I'm sorry if any of you have ever received reviews that break your heart. Sending hugs.
The saying I grew up with: 'If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all', or this one... 'Treat others how you would want to be treated'.
Well... in this industry, these basic rules for humanity do not exist. I have proof.
Reviewers Gone Wild
I sat at my desk on May 8th and cried. A friend had to console me, I was so upset. I sobbed at the sheer cruelty of this person's comments and how they seemed researched and real. The comments were, to me, legitimate as they mentioned things that I do have in my book, but they were so... mean. I scoured the opening chapter of the book for hours that evening looking for the mistake/s he'd said were on the first line. I had others do the same. I checked the e-book edition and the paperback edition. Nothing. Nobody could see what this person was referring to, and that made me even more anxious. Was I such a terrible author that I couldn't even see what should have been staring me in the face? Was I less skilled than this person?
Friends and family said the review seemed malicious. But if his comments were malicious or meant to either turn others off reading it, what could I possibly have done to this person (or in a past life!) to deserve that kind of behaviour from a complete stranger? This sent me into a spiral of anxiety. I couldn't comprehend how somebody thought that was OK. Basic kindness... thrown out the window. Constructive criticism in a helpful manner without offending or causing hurt... out the window. Reviews don't have to be positive, but they don't have to cause pain. Who was this person?
For a few minutes, I explored the possibility that I may already know them. Maybe it was somebody I knew, or did know, who had a grudge and saw an opportunity to express it through a fake account? Surely, I would remember parting on such negative vibes. Nah... too much effort. And this person's account was not my target audience, had no other links to books or the literary world in any way. They did not even have recent posts I could see (as their profile was public). I was so confused as to how my book could have ended up in this person's hands, but I did have a paperback sale earlier in the week that stunned me.
Maybe... just maybe... this review was real?
A friend said that obviously, somebody was jealous, wanting to put me down to raise themself up. But why me? I'm not exactly J. K. Rowling! There are writers out there far more involved in social media doing much MUCH better than me. Nah... not likely. They'd pick on somebody who they thought was their own size (or the size they wanted to be).
Then, I had a bookish friend take a look; she thought it looked suspicious, like spam or a bot... or something. She suggested I report it, block the account to be safe, and hide it from my Facebook page. I did all those wise things and never heard back thank goodness, but the hurt and doubt had been planted in my soul. It unnerved me that somebody could be so publicly cruel to another person, because I would never ever deem anything like that appropriate, even from a professional or famous critic!
Was To See A World truly THAT terrible? If you've read Parts 1 and 2 of this series, you'll know about my discovery of AI and my caution with using it for certain things. This person's awful review led me to want to limit the print of that particular edition of To See A World and remove everything AI image related to re-release the version I have on sale today. I should say here that my books are NOT written with AI. I just played around with to create a few pictures of characters and locations for a bit of fun. I wish I hadn't had the audacity to think that was OK!
The decision made me sad because I loved the extra visuals I'd included, but I could see how some readers may not appreciate the use of AI, or want the characters presented for them. Imagination is so important in this industry, so I made the decision to, sadly, let the internet troll win. I kept the images though, and you can see them all proudly on my website if you want to have a look. Just click to explore Haeylo.
Here's the book the reviewer hated:
Let's End on A Positive Note
Later in the entry, I did note some positive things down.
I'd sent some mailings out about my talks and workshops on creative writing, hoping to inspire some local groups to pick up a pen too. This was exciting as I'd never used snail mail to promote myself before.
I got my first ever Amazon ad click. No sale, but somebody clicked the damn thing!
I ran a Facebook ad (that niggled me because there was one thing I couldn't figure out how to amend). Well... I fixed it!
Here's the book I re-created (out now):
The more I think about that review as time has passed, the more I think it was likely just spam or a fake profile trying to drum up business elsewhere. On that same journal entry, I wrote that I'd been getting lots of spam and phishing messages/comments on my FB page that I'd had to report, which seemed to happen since I started posting to FB groups as if I'd invited them to target me. Logic suggests one of the scammers uses this fake profile to generate some dread and self-doubt in their 'clients', then sent a message from a professional-looking page to help fix... coincidentally... those exact problems. So if you've experienced anything similar, please stay safe and get suspicious posts and messages reported, blocked, deleted and then ignored.
You're doing amazing. Know that.
Real or not, if I had one short message for that person. I would say...
'It doesn't matter if you like my book or not. All you have to do is be kind.'
I hope this content helps you as an author to feel seen; you're not the only one out there experiencing this kind of hurt. You should know there is plenty of good intermingled with these struggles, and they are worth the wait. Please stick with me for the 4th instalment in this series coming soon...
Rach x
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